Part 1 Written 8/9/13 - Part 2 written 12/9/14

I used to dread running into anybody from any past that I don’t intentionally stay connected with. I dreaded it because I was still living in my Mom’s house. They’d be like “where are you these days?” and you’d have to look down and thin your lips just enough to allow it to escape your mouth “still at my mom’s place.”

I’d still hate to admit that, but now I live in my friend’s parent’s place. Booya. Dawn and Ed Kropp are Elliott's parental units, not mine, but because I'm living in both Spokane and Portland to make it work with a worthwhile lady, cheap rent is a must.

It’s the best. What offspring see as nagging, grown up people see as normal human conversation.

Mom: How was your day?

Offspring: Stop suffocating me!

Dawn: How was your day?

Me: IT WAS GREAT HOW WAS YOURS?

That’s what I call quality jib-jab.

Things I used to see as givens like a spotless kitchen or the lights turned off are now insane living bonuses. I woke up the other day with my coffee all set up, all I had to do was pour. I love living with parents!

- Begin Part 2-

Louis CK has a great standup bit about growing up. He says your inner child has died when you walk into Home Depot and get excited about knobs. I could care less about knobs but the above holds a similar connotation. Clean kitchens never mattered to Mac the professional Kid (I had a business card). Mac the Project Manager is likely to go on a cleaning warpath when he comes home from China and the kitchen is a mess.

Living habits can change and you might miss your childhood, but I’ll be damned if I ever stop watching The Simpsons past my bedtime.

...I have grown out of wearing goggles in the hot tub though.